Christmas Card Choices

I'm enjoying the trips to the mailbox this month. Everyday I hope for a card or two or seven.  I love receiving Christmas cards. To help curb my hypocritical nature I send them out. This year I mailed 200. It's excessive and ridiculous I know. Especially with Facebook, this blog, email, etc., people know what we look like, they can find out any ole day what I'm up to. Christmas cards are simply an indulgence.

Indulgence seems to be my Christmas theme. It's pretty pathetic. I've eaten more cookies, fudge, ice cream, and pie in the last 6 weeks than I have in the last 18 months. The seams on my skinny jeans are straining. I can hear my fat cells cheering, "M.E.R.R.Y. Christmas!" I could be really discouraged by my lack of restraint, but the last year has taught me that I can say no. I can choose any day to make healthy choices. Apparently right now I'm choosing sweets over sweat, sugar over sensibility, carbs over cardio. And it the grand scheme of things...I say,"big stinkin' deal." Life is a series of choices. Despite the cravings, the addictions, the habits, and the preferences we do have (for the most part) the ability to choose. When I'm ready to choose health-I will do it.

I want to address the flip side though. There are some things we can not choose. I'm acutely aware that this Christmas isn't easy for some of the people I love most in my life. While I'm here in a sugar haze, many people I love are dealing with devestating circumstances beyond their control.

I have dear friends who will receive my Christmas card full of family photos and happy highlights and they just might want to tear it up or throw it in the garbage. This Christmas they are dealing with divorce, serious addictions, or loneliness due to the death of a loved one. At some level I'm dealing with all of those things too. When you love others - you let the pain come in. And I can tell that I'm using indulgence as a temporary respite from reality.

Cookie comfort. I want more than that. I want to taste, touch, see and feel true hope. I crave the Scripture I chose for the back of our Christmas card:

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit. Romans 15:13

Hope Means Rejecting

I'm stealing the title of this post from the title of Gregg's sermon on December 4. His sermon that day had me nodding my head in agreement so much that the people behind me must of thought I was a bobble head doll. Near the beginning of service, Gregg read from Isaiah 64:1-5 (TNIV) And then he asked this question, "What do you want God to do for you?"

Oh, that you would rend the heavens and come down,
   that the mountains would tremble before you!
As when fire sets twigs ablaze
   and causes water to boil,
come down to make your name known to your enemies
   and cause the nations to quake before you!
For when you did awesome things that we did not expect,
   you came down, and the mountains trembled before you.
Since ancient times no one has heard,
   no ear has perceived,
no eye has seen any God besides you,
   who acts on behalf of those who wait for him.
You come to the help of those who gladly do right,
   who remember your ways.
But when we continued to sin against them,
   you were angry.
   How then can we be saved?


I sat there in the silence and the first thing that popped into my head was a request for Alan and Brynn to make it back safely from the Bible Quiz meet at Twin Rocks Friends Camp. That seemed silly. I really had no doubts that I'd see my husband and daughter in a couple of hours, so I thought it strange and almost shallow that I'd be asking for God to bring them home. I scrunched my eyes tight and thought again..., "What do I want, what do I want?" God affirmed my more lofty goal of wanting to live more passionately for Him. Relieved that I had sought out a greater gift than simply the emminate return of my husband and child, I joined the singing of "O Come, O Come Emmanuel" with gusto. 


Then what to my wondering eyes should appear? Before the song ended, my husband slid into the pew next to me, whispered hello and let me know Brynn had already stationed herself in the nursery. Alan, here next to me - two hours ahead of schedule. I smiled and thanked God for his immediate and loving answer to the deepest prayer of my heart. He confirmed that it wasn't foolish to want my husband and daughter home. The Holy Spirit spoke intensely to me in that moment. God is so keenly aware of our desires and his joy is to bring us joy. I will live more passionately for God as I continue to know him more, to trust in his goodness, and to witness and share his faithfulness.


Hope means rejecting. Rejecting our doubts:
 I'm not praying correctly. 
 I don't know what I want. 
 I can't ask for that.


Hope means rejecting. Rejecting what is wrong. Rejecting the pain. Rejecting suffering. Rejecting poverty. Rejecting the status quo. Rejecting materialism. Rejecting perfectionism. Rejecting denial.


Hope means rejecting. It means seeing with wide open eyes the places and circumstances in our life and our neighbors lives that aren't right. It means we have a need for hope because we want things to be better. It means we know that each and every person on earth needs a Savior. 


O Come, O Come Emmanuel.

Poverty 101

My friend Jennifer, who is a college student at George Fox University, asked me to help her with a feature article for a class on the topic of poverty and the Christian attitude towards poverty. I was more than happy to share my experience and what I've learned in the last couple of years through my advocacy with Compassion International and the live58.org movement. I've also been educated by reading "When Helping Hurts" and the ministry of the Dave and Debby Thomas. Below is the   interview questions she asked and my responses.  

1. In your own words, define poverty.

Poverty is not just economic destitution or strife. It can also be a broken spiritual, emotional, or physical relationship. The more I learn about poverty, the more I understand how all of these things are tied together. One of my favorite definitions of poverty is from Wess Stafford, President of Compassion International. He says, "The opposite of poverty is not wealth, it's enough." I think about the song "Your Grace Is Enough" and I hope that when I define eradicating poverty, that I'll base my definition and my measure of success on God's grace…that it is indeed enough. And the amazing thing about grace, is it's richness and abundance!

2. How would you describe the Christian view of poverty? 

This seems like a mighty hard question to answer since I don't feel like I can speak for the whole of Christendom. But I do believe that followers of Christ are beginning to move to a more holistic view of poverty (spiritual, emotional, physical, and financial) than ever before. We are understanding that we must attack poverty from all angles and not just providing short term aid…throwing money at the problem. Unfortunately, I think many Christians still see poverty as something that cannot be overcome. We aren't really willing to do the work that Jesus calls us to in Matthew 25. Overcoming poverty requires that we give up our comforts for the good of others. And most 1st world Christians aren't willing to actually "give till it hurts" in all manner of ways  - not just financially.

3. What has your experience been in working with those in poverty?

When I went to the Philippines and Honduras the first thing I noticed was the financial poverty. For an upper middle class American, the living conditions seemed overwhelmingly challenging. But as I talked to the people and begin to enter into their world, my eyes were opened to see that what mattered most was not the size of their home or their lack of things, but whether or not they were living with broken relationships in terms of spirituality, emotional, and/or physical distress. When an individual possessed a hope in Christ and had experienced God's love (understanding that they had value as a child of God), the financial poverty that they were living in was not as important. This is not to say that financial poverty doesn't matter-because it certainly does. People need to be able to eat, to have a safe living environment, and to have access to healthy care and education. But knowing God provides hope and as it says in Romans 5:5 "Hope does not disappoint."

4. Through your charitable work and experiences, what do you see as being the root causes of poverty?

A lack of hope cause by broken relationships. Greed. Lack of education (scholastically and Biblically). When people do not know what they were intended for, when they have no means in which to pursue their dreams, hope is lost. 

5. How do you see Christians succeeding or falling short in combating global poverty?

We are succeeding by understanding more and more that we can and must do something for those living in poverty. It's not just about "them" it's about "us." Each one of us lives in some sort of poverty. Quite often we, the affluent, live in emotional or spiritual poverty. We cannot ignore or place blame or pretend that poverty is someone else's problem. We must as Christians be the leaders and the initiators in combating poverty on a global scale. We must use a holistic approach. We must raise up a generation of children living in poverty to understand that God does indeed have a hope and a future for them. Organizations such as Compassion do just that. Where we fall short is in accepting the status quo. We take too seriously the thought that "the poor will always be with us" and accept that as an excuse to turn our back or ignore those in extreme poverty. This is an abomination and not what Christ meant. We can see over and over in the Bible that God calls us to love and care for the poor. 

6. What are the next steps the Christian community should take in combating global poverty?

If every Christian made a personal commitment to a child living in poverty, joined in the fight against sex trafficking, donated to organizations that provide safe water and/or contributed to the prevention of AIDS, etc., we would change the world. There are so many ways to say, "I don't believe this is how life should be for the majority of the people living on the planet. I will do something to help eradicate poverty." It's not that we lack organizations already in place to provide help…it's about deciding that changing the world is more important than our own comfort. 

Saying YES to Kids

Tomorrow will be a return to my first love...children. Everyday as pastor of children and family ministry at my church I work for children. But it isn't every day that I actually get to work with children. Before I entered into pastoral ministry about three years ago my home was abuzz with anywhere from 2-8 kids on a daily basis. As a stay-at-home mom, our house was the place where friends could call up at a moments notice and drop off their tots while they had anything from a haircut to a marriage counseling appointment. I was also the primary child care provider for two families on a regular basis for over 7 years.  I loved this life. At times it was overwhelming and exhausting. Other times I felt a bit trapped in my own home...but the truth is I did have a lot of freedom. Freedom to wear my jammy pants all day long (showers optional). More importantly I had the freedom to say "yes" to children. "Yes, I like the picture you drew." "Yes, I'll change your diaper...again" "Yes, we can snuggle and read this story before nap time." "Yes, I'll feed you, wash your clothes, dry your tears, wipe your mouth, brush your hair, and help you with your homework." Y E S.

My role as an advocate for children has taken many forms. As a mom who cared for my own young children and those of my friends, I know that my advocacy wasn't far reaching, but it ran deep. I was able to be a consistent and loving presence to the children entrusted to me. Now as a children's pastor, my advocacy looks different. It's more administrative than demonstrative. My voice might carry a little farther, but it rarely has the chance to sink in. Blink and I'm off on the next task, program, event, service, class, camp, etc. As a child advocate and sponsor for Compassion International I have the opportunity to build relationships, speak out for truth, help eliminate poverty, and share hope. This is work that I feel called to do by God, but it doesn't give me a lot of "face time" with kids.

But tomorrow will be different. It's retro Michelle day. It will be a day where the house will be filled with kids. I'll make time to snuggle, play with Legos, cut an apple, open the yogurt, read a book, change a diaper (or 4), laugh at non-sensical phrases and questions, act silly just to get a laugh, and say "yes" to kids as much as possible.

Brynn, Jolee, Abby, Finley, Hudson, Grace, and Jilian - Thank you!

Jolee, Brynn, and Tyler on a good day back in 2005. Feeling Crafty!

Tyler, Austin, and Brynn...Yeah, my childcare skills are amazing. The truth is they put themselves in the dog crate and I had to get a picture. This one is way back in 1999.

58:

I might just be a little obsessed. My teenage daughter says, "it's cute how you love it so much." Yep, I'm head over heels for 58. Isaiah 58, 58: the film, 58 the movement. live58.org

Isaiah 58
¹ “Shout it aloud, do not hold back. 
   Raise your voice like a trumpet. 
Declare to my people their rebellion 
   and to the house of Jacob their sins. 
² For day after day they seek me out; 
   they seem eager to know my ways, 
as if they were a nation that does what is right 
   and has not forsaken the commands of its God. 
They ask me for just decisions 
   and seem eager for God to come near them. 
³ ‘Why have we fasted,’ they say, 
   ‘and you have not seen it? 
Why have we humbled ourselves, 
   and you have not noticed?’

   “Yet on the day of your fasting, you do as you please
   and exploit all your workers.
⁴ Your fasting ends in quarreling and strife,
   and in striking each other with wicked fists.
You cannot fast as you do today
   and expect your voice to be heard on high.
⁵ Is this the kind of fast I have chosen,
   only a day for a man to humble himself?
Is it only for bowing one’s head like a reed
   and for lying on sackcloth and ashes?
Is that what you call a fast,
   a day acceptable to the LORD?

 ⁶ “Is not this the kind of fasting I have chosen:
to loose the chains of injustice
   and untie the cords of the yoke,
to set the oppressed free
   and break every yoke?
⁷ Is it not to share your food with the hungry
   and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—
when you see the naked, to clothe him,
   and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?
⁸ Then your light will break forth like the dawn,
   and your healing will quickly appear;
then your righteousness will go before you,
   and the glory of the LORD will be your rear guard.
⁹ Then you will call, and the LORD will answer;
   you will cry for help, and he will say: Here am I.

   “If you do away with the yoke of oppression,
   with the pointing finger and malicious talk,
¹⁰ and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry
   and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,
then your light will rise in the darkness,
   and your night will become like the noonday.
¹¹ The LORD will guide you always;
   he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land
   and will strengthen your frame.
You will be like a well-watered garden,
   like a spring whose waters never fail.
¹² Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins
   and will raise up the age-old foundations;
you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls,
   Restorer of Streets with Dwellings.

 ¹³ “If you keep your feet from breaking the Sabbath
   and from doing as you please on my holy day,
if you call the Sabbath a delight
   and the LORD’s holy day honorable,
and if you honor it by not going your own way
   and not doing as you please or speaking idle words,
¹⁴ then you will find your joy in the LORD,
   and I will cause you to ride on the heights of the land
   and to feast on the inheritance of your father Jacob.”
            The mouth of the LORD has spoken.

Join me in the thought, the hope, the reality that extreme poverty could be eliminated in the next 25 years. This Friday night we'll be showing 58: the film at Newberg Friends Church, 7pm.

I do love 58. I made little 58: flyers and stapled them to the halloween candy tonight. I had fun greeting the neighborhood kids in my Zumba "costume" and giving them handfuls of candy with the flyers attached. My husband carved an amazing LIVE 58: pumpkin and it made the trick or treaters curious.

I'm not sure that a Reese's peanut butter cup with a 58: flyer attached can change the world. But I wonder what conversations will be sparked when kids go home and sort through their candy.... some will simply throw the flyer away. Maybe a few families will be curious enough to go to the live58 website. Others might actually find their way to the church and see the film. And perhaps even one will be encouraged to find a way they can participate in eliminating poverty.

My prayer is that God will continue to show me his heart, inspire me to share his love, and work through me to live out Isaiah 58.

13.1 Accomplished.

A week ago I accomplished my goal. Completing a 1/2 marathon. It's finished. But honestly, this is just the beginning. It was so much fun, I'm hooked and after my knee recovers a bit, I'm going to begin training for my next one. I learned so much from this process.

1. If you say you'll do something, don't give up. Just restart and keep going.
2. Running is 1/3 physical and 2/3 mental.
3. It's possible. With God ALL things are possible.
4. Prayer matters. Prayers work.
5. I can run for 13.1 miles without stopping.

My two favorite t-shirt slogans I saw at the Girlfriends Half
1. (the one I was wearing) Start Strong, Finish Stronger
2. (the one the lady in front of me was wearing) Courage to Start, Faith to Finish

Before the race in downtown Vancouver, WA.  Great window sign.

Ok, maybe a little nervous/excited/anxious to get going...

With my buddy Abbie. She made me a necklace that I wore during the race that said:
He energizes the tired and gives fresh strength to the weak.

Starting off with 3199 other women! Working my way through the walkers.

Mile 13. Finishing the .1 with the best smile I could muster.

Focus...what? What focus?

Multiple occasions have come and gone when I should have been blogging lately. Processing through my thoughts through written words help me to clarify what I'm thinking and what I'm doing. Instead I've been spending a lot of my time in the last two months trying to stand facing one direction in the middle of a merry-go-round. If you've ever tried to do this you know it actually takes a lot of work to keep your balance while moving your feet just enough so that while the merry-go-round spins, you stay focused straight ahead. Unfortunately, while you're in the middle of the wheel, exerting all your energy to stay upright, you miss the 360 degree view. You also tend to avoid motion sickness, but that's another story and where my analogy breaks down.

Today I sat down in my pew and began scribbling down the list of questions I was asked and the interactions I was involved in during the 35 minutes of "community time" between services. Here's a glimpse of my life between being a guest presenter in the high school Sunday school class and settling into my pew for worship. In no particular order.

• Asked to take a picture of the kids playing outside on the church lawn in the fallen leaves.
• Told that 2/3's of the cotton balls from the resource room are now used up.
• Checked on the Ladies Tea sales upstairs in the church library and downstairs in the social hall. Made sure we had a volunteer at both stations.
• Picked up attendance folders from 2 adult and 9 children's Sunday school classrooms. Put in church office.
• Spoke to a friend about the tears in her eyes.
• Was asked where my daughter Jolee was.
• Was "surprised" by my daughter Jolee and her friends. They had been hiding in the library.
• Sold a tea ticket to my mother, upstairs.
• Discussed with a PsyD. student about being a floater/volunteer in children's ministry. Sold her a tea ticket downstairs.
• Tried to sell another tea ticket to a woman I miss seeing regularly. Her family will be out of town next weekend to visit her husband's mother. Had a short conversation about the importance of spending time with family no matter the cost of time and travel.
• Tried to sell a tea ticket to a college student - a definite No Go.
• Tried to sell tea tickets to two soccer moms. They are busy next Saturday at 11am.
• Was asked if I was teaching Sunday school in the 3rd grade class next Sunday. Couldn't remember.
• Spoke to a family about the fact that three weeks ago they had told me to take them off the church/children's Sunday school roster. For the last two weeks they have been at our church. Found out they are going to make NFC their church home after all. Will happily be reinstating them to all my email groups this afternoon.
• Checked to make sure the nursery volunteers were in place. One was missing. Went outside and downstairs to find her. Found her. 
• Cleaned up Ladies Tea ticket supplies. Placed items in my office box.
• Checked in with a first time volunteer about Children's Care happening during 2nd service and what she could expect.

As usual I missed the welcome and announcements (so I have no idea if K-2 Fun Night got announced). But I was feeling pretty good about making my way in to the sanctuary during the "stand and greet" section of our meeting. I thought, "ahh, now maybe I can settle into worship." 

During the church service I always leave at offering to help Children's Care get settled in. Today took a bit longer since we had a new volunteer and I needed to create "name tags" out of masking tape for the kids. Heading back into the sanctuary I saw a mom and her baby hanging out in the church library. I stopped to check in...who can resist a baby!

I made it back in to service and was enjoying the message when I was tapped on the shoulder and asked to come quickly. A child was bleeding profusely due to an injury caused by a coat hook. I got the little boy cleaned up and bandaged. As I was getting ready to return to service another child needed help. Potty time. Since our new volunteer wasn't quite sure of the protocol for bathroom procedures, I stayed and modeled what to do. Back in my pew I heard the last two minutes of the sermon and enjoyed the closing songs. 

The quick pic I snapped with my iPhone between services.

Church is just a wacky time for me. And honestly this post is NOT a complaint. My Sunday morning was filled with what I love...being a part of community. Certainly I do miss getting to be fully present in worship. But for now I will embrace where God has me. In the middle of the merry-go-round. Working hard to keep my balance and my eyes focused on Him.